Just this week, I read about someone who asked to give her baby for adoption so asked for the hospital social worker but they told her that she’d just have to deal with the baby. Somewhere else but still in our country, this very week, someone else went to the police station asking for help as she was unable to care for her baby and wants to place it in care. The police told her to go away. Both women/girls were spoken to in a very rude manner. They are but a fraction of the number of women and girls who undergo such harsh and uncaring treatment.
A crying baby was found by two young boys on their way to school. Newborn baby in a plastic bag that the mother had put the baby in then set the bag alight. Baby has burn injuries and suffered from hypothermia.
The horror of that innocent baby’s first hours in a world she didn’t choose to enter.
But what if the mother had asked for help and received none? What if she tried to place her baby for adoption and was told by her friends that she shouldn’t “sell” her baby, that it’s not right to give her child to “strangers?” What if she tried to get counseling but no-one in her township clinic (If there is one) gave her the right advice? What if she would have also gone to the police station for help but instead of being referred to a social worker, would have also been sent away harshly? What if the nurses where she would have given birth would have heaped scorn upon her and told her to just “deal with it?” What if these people were the type to have told her she made her bed, she must lie in it? What if she was surrounded by people who cared more about her ‘sins’ than about the future of the innocent baby she was carrying? What if they didn’t care that she was raped?
Why don’t they care about the baby?
For that’s the problem.
Punishing the mother punishes the baby.
Until they find the mother of this abandoned baby and charge her with abandonment, we won’t know what happened. What we do know is that she had either no access to the right type of information, or had access to information but no support.
This is why I put my number out there in this bad old world wide web. I know it’s not safe. I know any number of creeps could find it. But you know, since the month I put it on, countless girls and young women have gotten in touch. They’ve been forwarded to the right professionals. Caring, compassionate social workers and pregnancy centres.
Some girls sadly are being forced by their parents to abort and because they are minors, they need consent to place the child for adoption. (Another law I disagree with. Why is it easier to abort than to place a child for adoption?) Some were told by their boyfriends that they would support them but they’ve now disappeared. Others have girlfriends of their boyfriends calling them telling them to leave them alone because they are a family with an already born baby in the home. There are too many cases of young girls who either wanted to abort but found out too late, or want to place for adoption because their consciences don’t allow them to abort but abortion was the only option they knew of. Till they came to my comment under a thread on DIY Home Abortions. Yep, that’s where I put my number. Under such a thread. Just one less baby dumped in bushes will bring joy to me. So I continue to answer every stranger’s text message whether I see it in the day time or at night after feeding our baby. They need counseling. The right type. I’d love it if they could keep their babies. But I’d also love it if they got the right kind of help if they couldn’t parent.
One less baby in a plastic bag. That’s all I want.